Monday, December 17, 2012

In memory of my mother

My mother's name was Deborah Kay Chapman.
She was born on February 7, 1954 and died December 7, 2012.
She married my dad on August 29, 1975.  They had their fights, but stuck it out to the very end.  They were never separated.  They were together for 37+ years.  Wow!
I was born on November 23, 1979.  I'm an only child.  
We moved a lot and mom hated just about everywhere we lived except Fredericksburg.  She was the Welcome Wagon representative for a while here in Fredericksburg.  She welcomed new people into the community and she was good at it.  Her public face was a little different from when she was at home, but I think that's true for everyone, right?
She complained a lot, was pretty critical of everything, and never really seemed happy with life in general until her first grandchild, Thomas was born on August 3, 2004.  He was the apple of her eye.  
Her second grandchild, Charlotte, was born on September 6, 2007.  Her third, Samara, was born on August 28, 2009.  Her fourth, Alexavier, was born on October 13, 2011.  She said she never imagined she'd have 4 grandchildren because she only had one child.  She felt blessed by them and I've never seen her so happy as she was when she was with them.

So, what kind of medical issue takes a 58 year old grandmother of 4 away?  An aneurysm.  A BIG aneurysm.  She was sitting at my kitchen table, looking at rescuing a cat online, and collapsed.  She was still breathing on her own and her heart was still beating, but that was it.  Her other brain functions had stopped.  She died about 6 hours after the aneurysm burst.  She fought hard.  She was an organ donor and we know she saved some lives.  

It's kinda hard to say goodbye to the woman who gave you life.  I'm oddly OK with it, though.  She had health problems that caused some mental issues and created a rift between us.  I wish the last 5 years had been better, but it is what it is.  We made final arrangements for my mother to be cremated yesterday.  My dad and I are talking about spreading her ashes over her favorite waterfall.  


True to form, I took a few pictures of the time she and my dad were here for Thomas's 8th birthday.  These are the last pictures of my mother and they were few and far between.  She hated having her picture taken, but she wanted to this time.  I'm glad my kids have the memories.




Goodbye mom.  We love you!